life is a shit

hahaha,, kidding aside,,lately, i've been through every imaginable pain,,
my life has been a total mess,,
but i'm happier now, cause i've proven something to myself..
those people who value me and makes every pain tolerable do exist,,
and i thank each one of you,,
salamat ng maraming marami,,

i just broke up with my boyfriend,, hahaha,,
talgang i broadcast?
am still holding on though,,
my friends keep on telling me that i don't deserve the pain he's causing me,.
but you see it's very rare that i would go gaga for a guy..
often times i act so tough,,
but honestly am really really weak when it comes to love..
and boy am i not ashamed to admit it..

ohh well,, pride?
where would it bring me naman dba?
haaay,,

SAD but TRUE

Sabi ni God
Pasayahin daw kita,,

Kasi nakita ka
daw niya
malungkot,,
nag iisa..

pero sabi ko.,
AYOKO!

Tanong niya
kung bakit..

sabi ko..

"di po kasi ako
makakapagpasaya
sa kanya..

SEX po.."

don't get me wrong people,, it's not my boyfriend that i am talking bout..

it is those stupid guys out there, thinking that the only way for a girl to prove her love to him is through sex..

those kind of guys, sucks!

and i hate them,,

and what's really pissing me off is the fact that at the end of the day the girl they would look forward to marry are those women or ladies that had kept their virginity and degrade those who lost theirs(virginity, that is),, you know guys honestly, that is very immature of you.. you don't take the responsibility of committing your life to that girl you promised to love and be so devoted to,, not only that,, you would also spread rumors about them as well,, how pathetic!

girLs,girLs,girLs..

you are not going to be his first, his last nor his only..

he loved before; he will love again..

but if he loves you now, what else matters?

He's not perfect, you're not either..

If he can make you laugh and

if he admits to being human and

making mistakes,

hoLd on to him..

He's not going to be thinking of you every moment of the day,

but he will give you a part of himself that he knows you can break

-- his heart..

so don't hurt him..

don't change him..

don't analyze and don't expect more than he can give..

SmiLe when he makes you happy

Beacuse PERFECT GUYS...

DON'T EXIST!!

i know,, i know,, easier said,, than done..

Love

is like desperately hanging on to something precious,

not wanting to give up

but your hands feel the pain

and when finally let go

you're free from the pain

but your hands are empty

Show some Love

the greatest disease in the world isn't medical..

it's being unwanted..

unloved and uncared for..

we can cure physical diseases but the only cure for despair is love..

there are those who are dying for a piece of bread..

but many more are dying for a piece of love..

share it everyday..

- GREY'S ANATOMY

i don't know what's with me lately, that i simply go gaga

for this kind of stuffs.. there had been many messages with such theme

also the homily that the priest from our university had the same topic..

but lately, i realized that it's true,,

many people don't value who they have in their lives not knowing

that each time they disregard this people they're hurting them more and more.. and when the time comes that they've realized their mistakes,, it is also the time when the people who cherished them most has given up on them..

Don't wait for that time to come..

Value those people that you have in your lives..

It's not everyday that you will meet someone that you know would mean a lot to you and would ive a huge impact in your life..

me, me n me

i love my new shout out n mah friendster account..

"losers weepers!! i love myself,, i dnt care a damn what u think of me,, i'm proud of who i am n i know what i could be,, just wait n see,, but when that time comes,, darn! dnt ya dare fall in love with me!!"

actually i don't know why i sound so bitter.. hihi..

maybe i just want to prove something to a certain somebody,,

but the thing is i don't know who that somebody is either..

kung tinamaan ka..

baka ikaw nga..

*LOLZ*

LoGiC cLasS

waaaah,, m so happy naman,,
sa wakas may nagsabi sa'kin na tahimik daw ako.. DAW!!

Last Wednesday
(after cLass)

Me : Sir, bakit niyo po ako tinwag kanina?
Sir : you're so quiet kasi, m wondering if you get d lesson.. gets mo ba?
Me : *smiLe* of course sir, cge po,, thanx..

after that i just laughed out loud,, cause what he did not know was that i was actually passing notes with my friends (ji & amor) ;)

Tribute to Sir John

Waaaah... i miss him so much!

It's not like we're that close or anything..

but he is one of those people who is so dear to me..

He cares like nobody else does(except for some friends)

i never thought that that day would come,,

it never crossed my mind that he be going to seminary..

it was just like yesterday that i would be going to his office cause of my tardiness,,

he would always reprimand me,,

but as stubborn as i was,,

i never listened to him,,

but, i always look forward in seeing him,,

that's when i realized that as each year passes by,,

he means to me more and more..

he taught me how to be me and all..

haaay..

ohh well maybe there is indeed a calling from God,,

I just wish him the best in the path he opted to take..

God Bless, Sir John

14 deep questions that will really tell you something

from cesc' site.. ;)

1. What is more difficult for you, looking into someones eyes when you are telling someone how you feel, or looking into someones eyes when they are telling you how you feel?
>when they are telling me how they feel,, specially if the feeling is not mutual,, it's kinda hard knowing you're special to them but they can never be that special to you.

2. Think of the last time you were REALLY angry. WHY were you angry? Do you still feel the same way?
>i was so so angry the other night,, cause of my mom,, she just don't know when to stop,, i was so exhausted and trying to do my accounting assignment,, and she kept on telling me stuffs,, grrrr.. now? naah!!

3. You are on a flight from Honolulu to Chicago non- stop. There is a fire in the back of the plane. You have enough time to make one phonecall. Who do you call? What do you tell them?
>my mom,, God knows howw much i love her even though she's really getting to my nerves at times,, i would just like to tell her how much i love her and how much she means to me,, and sorry for being such a pain,, another thing is that no matter what i would look after them,, specially my siblings,,

4. You are at the doctor's office and he has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? What do you do with your remaining days? Would you be afraid?
> i won't tell anyone,, i love those people who loves me and care for me muchie much,, i would spend each day meaningfully,, iL show them how much i care and all,, iL do everything i wanna do,, no time for regrets,, iL be very appreciative of what i have now,, i won't be afraid,, honestly i'm ready to die any time.. *toinx*

5. You can have one of the following two things: trust/love. Which do you choose? Why?
>trust,, it's hard to love someone you don't trust.. so if they trust you it's awhole lot easier for them to fall for you.. :)

6. You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late even once more, you are fired. Do you take the time to save the dogs life? Why or Why not?
>Wutta dilemma,, what kind of dog? *toinx! can't answer! tough one! It would be in my conscience if i would let the poor dog drown but it ould be very devastating to lose my job.. wheeew!!

7. You are unfaithful to your spouse/significant other. Do you tell him/her? Why or Why not?
> yes, if i'm ready for the consequence and all,, if i know that i'm ready to change and wiLLing to prove to him how sorry i was with me being so unfathful and all

8. Your best friend confesses that he/she has feelings for you more than just friendship. He/she is falling in love with you. What do you do/say?

>SORRY, di tayo talo.. hihi.. i don't really like it when my bestfriend falls for me,, but they say that it's the strongest foundation one relatonship can have,, i just don't want to lose my bestfriend..

9. Think of the last person who you know that died. You have the chance to give them 1 hour of life back, but you have to give up one year of yours. Do you do it? Why or Why not?

>My uncle. Yes, i would,, i love my uncle so much,, he means a lot to me,, and i know ho many people grieved when he died,, and i know it would mean a lot to those people as well to spend one last hour with him..


10. Are you the kind of friend that you would want to have as a friend?

>YES. but more matured in some ways and more sensible,,

11. Does love = sex?

> NOPE!!! sex is mere lust.. it should never be equal to love..

12. Your boss tells your co-worker that they have to let them go because of work shortage, and they are the newest employee. You have been there much longer. Your co-worker has a family to support and no other means of income. Do you go to your boss and offer to leave the company? Why or Why not?

>Leave the office,, because i know that i can find another job, and that tmy co-worker needs the money more than i do..


13. When was the last time you told someone HONESTLY how you felt regardless of how difficult it was for you to say? Who was it? What did you have to tell the person?

>SUMMER. It was my friend's friend, he got into my nerves,, he kept on asking me if he could court me and all,, but i had a oyfriend then and m not really interested with him,, so i told him straight that he got no chance, not a bit, for so many reasons and mainly because he was so 'yabang' n really don't like him,, not even as a friend *harsh*

14. What would be (or what was) harder for you to tell a friend, you love them or that you do not love them back?

>I do not love them back, cause of the fear of ruining the friendship and all the meamories,, i love my friends so much,, they're my othr half,, and i value them so much,, they make my life complete,, they make my life a heaven here on earth.. that's why i cannot afford to lose any of them.

me so numb

i just browsed my blog,, God,, i was so over my chie che pala,,
i was having different thoughts lately,,
we're on the rocks kasi,,
i don't honestly know how to deal with my emotions anymore..
There had been instances that i just want to give up..
I just want to lose the pain,,
But somethings telling me,, within me,,
that i should just hold on..
i don't really know what to feel actually,, its lke,,
i'm so numb..